An Open Letter to the One that could have been

Hey you,

From the first moment we met, we hit it off. It was almost magical, similar to chummy rom-com flicks and books that you wouldn’t read even if you have to die for it. I’ve never thought I could meet someone who’s unique as I am but I did and here you are, still invading my thoughts every now and then and making me wonder of the thousand what-ifs we could have done if we end up together.

My experience with love is mediocre at best but I know when something’s quite the extraordinary from what’s not. I know enough that you’re special for me and maybe it would be a long time (or no chance at all) to meet someone like you in my lifetime. We finish each others’ sentences, laugh at the same time from a thought left unspoken, stick out to each others’ whims and accept each others’ quirks.

You perfectly get me. I’ve told you things I’ve never told just anyone. You’re the other part of my soul. I bare to you my weakness, my dreams, my fantasies, the stories left untold and my biggest fears and you told me yours. Looking back now, it’s ironic to think that of all the things I told you, it’s my feelings for you that I kept locked up for so long. We’ve talked of different things, of ourselves, of other people, but we never talked about us, not in a way I think about now.

I guess that had been my first fault. I didn’t take that leap of faith for fear of shattering my pride. I kidded myself into thinking that you would make the first move, that at some point lightning will strike and you will suddenly hold my arm and turn me around, look at me in the eyes and say you’re willing to take up the chance with me.

But we could never be, and that’s that. Perhaps we’re like two bright lights drawn to each other, but once we touched, we will explode. Like stars dancing in each others’ orbits. We can only draw close but we can’t go no farther. Perhaps, it’s better this way. Perhaps, the other way is better and we’re too stupid to see it.

Always know that you are still in the deepest recesses of my mind, a memory that makes me smile when our favorite song in the radio comes up, or when I remember that lame joke only the two of us can understand.

And hey, maybe we’ll meet again. Maybe one day, you’ll stumble upon this letter and realize it has been you all along. Or maybe you won’t and we’ll eventually meet that someone we’re going to happily spend our lives with. And maybe someday, in some reunion or wild chance that we meet, I’ll make you read this letter and we’re going to make a joke about this.

In the end, I’m hoping that even if we may not be happy together, we will be happy for each other. And looking back now, I think I’m moving closer to being okay with that.

Yep, I think I’ll be okay with that.

Sincerely,

The girl who’s too stupid to see ‘it’

About sentimentalfreak

Consistently inconsistent. Forever searching and wandering. 'Tis only writing that calms down her restless little soul.

Posted on September 5, 2014, in reflections and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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