Why I’ve stopped asking God ‘Why’

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I’m a ‘why’ person. As a reporter, my favorite type of questions are the ‘Why’ ones. I would often reserve them to the last, after we’ve gone through the boring facts and figures, details and data, like a dessert after the appetizer and main course. My mentors would often lightly reprimand me that the lead of my news articles are usually long and feature-like; it’s because the ‘Why’ answers are always emphasized in the lead than the popular ‘What’, ‘Who’, ‘When’,and ‘Where’

My other favorite question is ‘How’ if I’m really interested with the subject but let’s talk about that some other time.

Why did you launch this project?
Why did you choose this age group as your target audience?
Why did you say that the youth today is the hope of the future?
Why are you so concerned with this cause?

I like to call ‘why’ questions as questions that allow the readers to focus more on the person than the subject, the ‘who’ than the ‘what’. ‘Why’s’ are personal; they allow you to solve one person’s motives, dreams, fears, history and other interesting tidbits (if you’re a gossip like me, kidding!).

It doesn’t work on God, however.

When I became a Christian, I’ve developed more questions than answers. Like with most people I know, they would usually ask ‘Lord, what is your plan in my life?’ or things like ‘Lord, where will you lead me?’ No I’m not that. I like to get deep and personal. After all, my newfound relationship with Christ granted me the Grace of that freedom. No sir, I wouldn’t settle for just answers in front of me. I’ll be demanding explanations.

My impatience and inherent independence usually bring me in conflict with God’s plan and mine. When things simply aren’t going my way, when I’m sick and frustrated over my own failures and stubbornness to listen to Him, I would demand the ‘Why’ right away. Why me? Why are you making me suffer? Why are you silent?

Why would you let this happen to me?

Why are you letting the innocent suffer?

Why must this person die?

Why are you letting bad things happen to your people?

And as you may have guessed, I received no reply. I thought, ‘I might as well be talking to a wall’

Asking ‘Why’ to God is a habit I have to give up, and mind you, it’s one of those hardest things I have to give up during my early days as a Christian. Still, I overcome it. It’s not because I got tired of asking Him questions. Usually, He would give the answers in the right time. It’s also not because I’ve stopped asking the ‘Why’ questions.

It’s because I’ve been asking them the wrong way all this time. I’ve forgotten the basic rule of journalism that the key for your answers lies on even the slightest revisions of your questions.

Instead of ‘Why are You like this to me?’, I began asking questions like:

‘Why am I like this?’

‘Why am I doubting Him?’

‘Why am I so afraid?’

‘Why am I losing faith now?’

And there, just like that, God would me give the answers. Yeah, I know. It took me ages to realize that.

This is WHY I’ve stopped asking Him why. Because in His grand scheme of things, let’s just face it, the answers to our Why questions are pointless. Instead, giving up our human nature to know ‘Why’ is the ultimate act of submission because you have no say in the matter anymore. It is your own leap of faith. It is defying logic and our own nature to fear the unknown. I’ve learned that the best testimonies of faith come from people who stopped asking ‘Why’.

When I was little and my parents used to bring me and my brothers to those pool trips, my dad would often ask me to ride the water slide. I have no idea where the slide would lead to but still, I didn’t hesitate to jump and slide all the way down, trusting with all my heart that my dad would be waiting at the bottom,with his arms outstretched to catch me so I wouldn’t drown. No questions asked. I knew that my father would be there waiting for me.

And this made me realize that asking too much questions can delay the fun or the wonderful promises He has planned for you. Being a ‘Why’ person has its perks, but when it comes to asking God, those ‘Why’s’ have to go.

About sentimentalfreak

Consistently inconsistent. Forever searching and wandering. 'Tis only writing that calms down her restless little soul.

Posted on March 3, 2015, in reflections and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment.

  1. This is a very sincere post. We all go through those things in our Christian growth process.

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